And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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