singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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