Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize