So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
