I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Randomize
