What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
