he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
