it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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