Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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