we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He did a backflip because drugs
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