Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
