sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize