We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize