White coat. Heels.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
