I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
