did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
