sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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