I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
