We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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