i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
