oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize