Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize