summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
