I only kidnapped one of them. chill
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Randomize
