You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
