Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My feet surprised me
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