i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
