This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
