Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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