Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
