i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
