I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I didn't shave. On purpose
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We were destined to go to rehab together
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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