how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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