I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
porn star boner night. come get it.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
