you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
That accounts for only three of the penises
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
