I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
