I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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