Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
