Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
