My brain says no but my pants say off.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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