THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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