remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize