I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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