Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize