Need sex. Gaining weight.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize