i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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