Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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