It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize