rhymes with "ouble enetration"
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize