I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
