if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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