It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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